Awakening is Neither Fun Nor Blissful
I was under the impression that awakening and being awakened was the ultimate state of contentment. It’s not—not even close.
Of course, I can’t speak for everyone and their experiences, but I strongly believe it’s the same for others and their awakening—at least as per my definition. Which is the process of increasingly perceiving beyond the 3rd dimension and peering into our actual reality, perceiving its workings.
Instead, the larger scope of reality is cruel and harbors intense injustice and sadness.
It’s not uncommon for those awakening to subconsciously block themselves from ever having experiences related to the process, myself included. Because as I write these lines, I recall my past 10-year-old self in despair waking up each night, crying because of the sadness I could feel coming from around me—coming from Gaya.
Not long after, I stopped seeing and feeling, but I wasn’t OK. It was like treating the symptoms of a disease, but it’s still there affecting your daily life. I was miserable for years and could not find a solution.
It wasn’t until I met my Starseed wife that I began to reawaken. Today I am seeing, hearing, and knowing more than ever. What I am discovering is awful, magical, mysterious, and awe-inducing.
There are many more bad things going on than what the good beings, who are sacrificing themselves to help us—to help Gaya, can keep up with.
In summary, I would draw a parallelism that it’s like waking up only to find yourself imprisoned, gagged, probed, and having your resources drained and used by the bad ones to further their intentions.
From this experience, I understand why Cypher, in the movie "The Matrix" wants to be re-plugged into the illusion with no memory of reality. That’s not an option for me though. Too much is at stake!
But that’s also the point: one MUST choose a side. Every time a choice is not made—your will is turned over to those wanting to use it, wanting to use you.
— Dane Broderick